Burbank Defeated!
Burbank - The Flowers did it again this week, posting a 108.19-99.57 victory over the Burbank Testeverdes. Keenan McCardell led the Flowers with four catches for 80 yards and two scores. It is interesting to note that while Keenan McCardell is a really old man that has no business in sports, he is nearly 7 years younger than Vinnie Testaverde (born 1963).Other highlights by the Flowers included Edgerrin James' 108 yard, 1 TD performance as well as Terrell Owens' 80 yards and 1 TD. A mar to the game was the possible injury of Steven Jackson, but test results have not yet been released. Also, Vinnie Testeverde was born the year that Kennedy was assasinated in Dallas, Texas.
The coaching staff was prepared to come under heavy criticism for their last minute pickup of league pariah Aaron Brooks, as well as their more startling move of making him the immediate starter. With the win, the handsome and charasmatic owner of the Flowers appears to be vindicated and possibly a genius.
The only dissent after the win came from whiny Carson Palmer who once again griped "I am the best [quarterback] on this team right now!" Derrick Mason then said "I am also the greatest, and Ruben [Droughns] can eat a dick." Droughns was unavailable for comment, because his mom's phone got cut off because she's so poor. Droughns is widely known to still live at home with his (fat) mother.
In response to his weekly outbusts, it looks like the Flowers management has decided to start Palmer next week against the fearsome Math. When asked about his second week of demotion, Tom Brady replied "I am at peace with all decisions, and all dreams mirror reality." This was especially strange considering that in 1963 (the year Vinnie Testaverde was born), Dr. Martin Luther King gave his famous "I have a dream" speech.
posted by The Minister of Information @ 7:37 PM
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